Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Relationships Over Porn...

I was reading a 'in the news' piece in Relevant Magazine's leaders guide that came in the mail this week. The piece indicated that new research from Time magazine found that social networking sites dominated the web traffic by college students. This should come as no surprise as one considers the myspace and facebook phenomenon. What surprised the researchers was that the visits to adult websites have fallen in large numbers. There has been a 33% decline over the last two years to adult websites in the 18-24 demographic. The conclusion by the researchers is that as online users get more interested in social networking, the less interested they are in pornography.

This makes sense to me in several ways.

1. Porn is a fantasy that can never deliver on what it promises. Sure, it's on-demand and readily available, but the relational value of porn is one way. It's literally skin deep, or paper thin. People go to porn for many reasons- one of them being to fill a void in their relationships, a desire to be wanted, etc. Yet porn cannot deliver in any real way because it is a lie.

2. People crave relationships. We want to be known. We want to be connected. Social networking sites like Myspace and Facebook are aware of this. We live in a society that is increasingly isolated from one another. Social Networking sites give people the opportunity to feel connected, to know someone on some basic level. But I think they eventually leave us wanting more. Social Networking sites have helped me reconnect with a few friends from the past, but beyond that it tends to be a glorified messaging system.

The Bottom line is that we are designed for community. We are designed to love and be loved. We desire to share our dreams, passions, fears, and experiences with others. Porn can't do that. Social Networking sites can begin the conversation- but let's be honest, we desire something deeper than what we can acheive through Facebook or a blog.

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